When I was a kid, I really wished that I could grow old faster to escape from the so-called childhood blues which I had endured in the early years....Well now that I am older now, and just passed 40 yrs and moving on. I found myself in an unfamiliar country and in a situation which could be make or break scenario...
Hounded by an indecisive career path, and a love life is as good as negligible or best left unspoken about, and a social life as almost identical as a hermit. When my marriage failed years ago, I thought that I could rely on my work to bring me joy and happiness as it is the one thing that for a long time has not broken my heart nor faith. I threw all my energies and soul into it.....but today, the results I am getting is really adverse and very upsetting sometimes. The reality that I have to face the world all by myself, and for all this years have somewhat wearing me down. Sometimes I even wish whenever before I go to bed.....and never wake up again. How foolish I could be right? Yes...or maybe it could how despair I am now?
Many years ago someone actually mentioned to me that "Good men always finished last", intially which I never agreed but now I believe it is true.
As for my love life......like Jerry McGuire the movie, it needs someone to make it complete. Like in Hitch, the need to feel love is to feel miserable when love is not around.....Sometimes love just ain't enough in reality and that I learnt from my failed marriage.
Sometimes I guess the only other way out of it all is to weather the storm......and see if there is any sunlight at the end of it.
The below URL is ONE of the songs...which I feel is a reflection of how I feel....
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1speLQVwbYE
Hounded by an indecisive career path, and a love life is as good as negligible or best left unspoken about, and a social life as almost identical as a hermit. When my marriage failed years ago, I thought that I could rely on my work to bring me joy and happiness as it is the one thing that for a long time has not broken my heart nor faith. I threw all my energies and soul into it.....but today, the results I am getting is really adverse and very upsetting sometimes. The reality that I have to face the world all by myself, and for all this years have somewhat wearing me down. Sometimes I even wish whenever before I go to bed.....and never wake up again. How foolish I could be right? Yes...or maybe it could how despair I am now?
Many years ago someone actually mentioned to me that "Good men always finished last", intially which I never agreed but now I believe it is true.
As for my love life......like Jerry McGuire the movie, it needs someone to make it complete. Like in Hitch, the need to feel love is to feel miserable when love is not around.....Sometimes love just ain't enough in reality and that I learnt from my failed marriage.
Sometimes I guess the only other way out of it all is to weather the storm......and see if there is any sunlight at the end of it.
The below URL is ONE of the songs...which I feel is a reflection of how I feel....
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1speLQVwbYE
No comments:
Post a Comment