It has been a long while since I last written anything here, some would say that this is the only place where I actually speak my mind out loud. In reality, I do wish that there is someone out there for me to tell it all. Maybe there is such a person out there which I have not found, or that it is just me who is too afraid to come looking for this person. Lord knows really how I do feel deep within. Or is it just me who is too afraid to tell it all and be vulunerable, and may even shed tears too.
I was often poised with a very touchy question: I should get married again, least there's someone to take care of me, and that for me, I would be more focused in my work and my life too. Well to be frank I truly welcome that thought and of course, I believe it would be a good thing too, for me but I have to be realistic and accept the fact it is too good to be real. Some people even say that I should transform into someone which I am not, to maybe achieve some success in relationships or better my chances with women. Truth is, though it maybe ugly as it is really a fact that I may not really have what it takes anymore to be a woman's man.
I have to be truthful to myself anyway to say that to be in a relationship, I may have the heart, soul and will but I do not have the financial capacity to keep it running. I am just not making enough to provide for another person, let alone my offspring. Seriously, I have to be truthful to not only myself but also to the other person who would spend her life with me. Anyway, I might as well forget all hopes about looking for the half of my life, just be a loner for life.
Would like to share a great song.....which will say a lot from my heart.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nDAifqUN3LQ
Friday, March 26, 2010
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